The Connection Between Purity and Prayer
In early 2011, I did something that I vowed I would never have to do again. I found myself filling out an application to enter a residential program for Christians in bondage. The first time I had completed a similar application was in 2002, as I took the necessary steps to enter a Teen Challenge facility in Florida. I was eighteen years old, completely given over to drugs and sexual sin, and spiritually lost. The Lord used that program in a remarkable way to open my eyes to the Gospel, and to bring me to repentance and belief in Christ. At that time, I could never have imagined that I would be entering another program as a resident nine years later. I had thought I was ready to enjoy my new life in Christ and make an impact on the world.
Contrary to my expectations, things did not turn out the way I had originally intended. Instead of taking the world for Jesus, I re-opened the door to sexual sin, and began a slow fade away from my first love in Christ. This brought me to a point of desperation, which is why I was writing my name, address and other pertinent information on an application for Pure Life Ministries, hoping that I would be accepted into their Residential Program.
As I filled out the application, I found it interesting that they wanted to know details about my devotional life. They inquired about my prayer life and how much time I spent with the Lord. They were interested in how often I read the Scriptures. As I wrote my answers, I could not see the correlation between my prayer life with the Lord and the addiction that had caused me to come to a place where I was willing to submit my life to another program. “I just need help with this addiction in my life. I need to get free from porn. Why are they asking all of these questions about my spiritual life?”
I probably breezed through that section, filling it out as quickly as possible. I am certain that I gave the impression that things were fine between me and God. If Pure Life Ministries wanted to dig into my issue, they should be asking more about my painful experiences as a child. They should be paying attention to the fact that I was exposed to pornography at age seven. But asking me about how much I prayed and read the Bible seemed completely irrelevant to my situation. I spent some time in prayer and still read the Bible. Sure, it was not as rich an experience as it had been early on in my relationship with the Lord, but it was not completely gone. That was my attitude as I finalized the application, sent it to the ministry and soon arrived at 95 Narrow Way in Dry Ridge, Kentucky.
<pull-quote>There is a direct correlation between the quality of one’s prayer life and true freedom from sexual sin.<pull-quote><tweet-link>Tweet This<tweet-link>
However, on the other side of the amazing work of repentance that the Lord did in my life during my time at Pure Life Ministries Residential Program, my perspective is dramatically different. Now I can see that there is a direct correlation between the quality of one’s prayer life and true freedom from sexual sin. You see, before finally submitting myself to the program, I had tried many avenues to get free. I had confessed to my wife and leadership around me. I had gone to a Christian psychologist to dig through my broken past. I had been diagnosed and medicated for mental illness. I had attended twelve-step program meetings. I had shed tears of sorrow. I had made several attempts to “fix” my problem… but none of them required true repentance.
Essentially—without realizing it—I was trying to treat the symptoms without dealing with the root issue. I was looking for someone else to blame for the mess I had created. I was hoping that a program or a pill was going to cure me. But I see now that the very root of my condition was my sin. And sin is a spiritual issue. Until I was willing to truly repent and get my heart right with the Lord, I was spinning my wheels. And one clear indicator about a person’s relationship with God is his or her prayer life.
True prayer is the intimate communication that believers enjoy with the Lord. When we allow sin into our lives, it will affect the quality of our prayer lives. Just like Adam and Eve immediately hid from the Lord after giving into their sin (Gen 3:8), the same happens to us when we live in unrepentant sin. We may still go through the motions of prayer. Most of us who profess Christ know enough words and formulas to go through the act of praying whether it comes from the heart or not. But the true joy and connection with the Lord fades when we allow sin into our lives. This is why Pure Life’s application included questions about the quality of my life in God. Because they understand the clear connection between purity and prayer.
<pull-quote>Be adamant to keep your prayer time from becoming a religious exercise; pour your heart out to the Lord and ask Him to help reignite the fire of your relationship with Him.<pull-quote><tweet-link>Tweet This<tweet-link>
Ironically, when I am counseling people today who are in similar circumstances to where I was when I applied to Pure Life Ministries, some of my first questions are, “What is your relationship with God like? How often do you pray? What is the quality of your devotional life?” Of course, someone can read the Bible and spend time in prayer and not automatically find freedom. But the quality of one’s prayer life serves as a great indicator of a person’s relationship with God. And when people are able to see that their sin is affecting their relationship with the Lord, then they are able to deal with the root of the issue and begin the painful but beautiful process of repentance.
If sexual sin has stolen the intimacy from your prayer life, here are a few practical steps you can take today to move toward restoration:
- Get totally honest with yourself.
Evaluate your prayer life and determine its true quality. Is the passion of your heart to seek the Lord or are you going through the motions? Can you honestly say that you are truly in love with Jesus? - Go to the Lord in open honesty and confess your sin.
Insist on having true communication with Him. Tell him about what you are experiencing. Cry out to Him for help. And obey whatever He leads you to do. - Take steps of repentance.
Expose your sin to a spiritual leader in your life. Confess to those around you whom your sin has impacted. Put boundaries around yourself and close every door to your sin. - Set aside some time every day to speak to God one-on-one.
Be adamant to keep this time from becoming a religious exercise. Instead, pour your heart out to the Lord and ask Him to help reignite the fire of your relationship with Him. He wants to help you. He promises if you seek Him, He will be found by you. (Jeremiah 29:13) - Seek further help if needed.
Some people, like me, need more help to get free. For those people, Pure Life Ministries offers both a Residential Program for men and an over-the-phone program for men or women. Give them a call today at 800-PURE-LIFE and share your situation and ask what they would recommend. I made that call nine years ago, and I have never regretted my decision to fill out that application, enter the program and have a powerful encounter with the God who is able to set the captive free.
